Really, what do you expect?  There’s an energy in your expectations, which will affect your behavior, and eventually lead you to attract what you expect.  So, be mindful of your expectations.

Expectations come from past experiences, most often childhood.  For example, if you frequently heard the word ‘no’ when you asked for something as a child, you might refrain from asking for things directly. Expecting to hear a ‘no’, you might find yourself cushioning your requests in an effort to make them sound sweeter.  Or, perhaps you avoid asking for things all together.

If you consistently got rejected by a group of friends, you might expect to be rejected in your current social situations.  This expectation might cause you to act shy, or ‘not yourself’ around other people. This type of behavior can lead to even more rejection, since people won’t be able to get to know you in the way you want to be known.

Expectations such as “work is hard”, or “there’s never enough time”, or “I’ll never get ahead”, will contribute to negative feelings, such as anxiety and fear. These negative feelings will make things feel hard, and zap your motivation, and your ability, to get things done.

Expectations can be tricky, since they’re so often proven right.  Because we see the proof, our expectations seem like indisputable facts. And if they’re indisputable facts, how can we change them?

The key here, is to realize that expectations are merely thoughts about the future, seen through the lens of past experience. 

So, even if we might not be able to change an indisputable fact, we can change both our thoughts, and the lens through which we see our future.

The bottom line? We can change our expectations to help us get what we really want.

How to change your expectations:

Be open to the possibilities. Things might turn out differently than you expect. You can’t be certain about what will happen in the future, so be open to different possibilities.

Rewrite your expectations. Write down a list of your most prominent negative expectations, and rewrite them to be more positive. For example — Change “I’ll never succeed” to  “Wouldn’t it be great if I succeeded at that.”  Don’t force a positive expectation that doesn’t feel true.  Instead, rewrite your expectation as a possible desirable outcome.

Notice your positive expectations. What do you consistently expect?  Do you you expect a great workout?  Do you expect a productive work time?  Do you expect a pleasant conversation with a certain friend?  Watch what happens with your positive expectations.

Keep a positive expectation journal. Expectations love proof. Note what happens as a result of shifting your thoughts.

Visualize.  Close your eyes and imagine a desirable outcome. As much as possible, get into the ‘energy’ of the scene using your emotions and senses.  Visualization will help you change your beliefs about what is possible.

Change your expectations and you will change everything.

 

In Courage,

Marian

 

To clear the old lens through which you see your future, contact me to learn how EFT Tapping can help.

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