Marian Buck Murray

EFT and IFS for Sensitive, Creative People. Empower yourself self-compassion and deep understanding.

Get UnStuck, Tap Into Your Flow

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Being stuck disrupts your creative flow. It can make you feel frustrated, anxious, hopeless, and stressed.

It’s especially hard to get unstuck when you don’t feel good about yourself. You know what you ‘should’ be doing. You watch others doing what you ‘should’ be doing.  But somehow you just can’t manage to get unstuck.  It can feel utterly hopeless at times.

I know, I’ve been stuck many, many times. But, finally I realized that my stuck places were actually trying to help me.

My stuckness led directly to places within that were calling for healing. When I stopped to pay attention, I was able to release old beliefs and emotions, and tap into my flow.

What if, for a moment, you stop trying to get unstuck. What if you stop to listen to what your heart is telling you?

When I’m stuck, here are some of the questions I ask myself :

  • What am I afraid of if I get unstuck?
  • What does this remind me of?
  • What emotions am I feeling?
  • Where do I need to give myself love and compassion?
  • What do I believe about myself in this moment?
  • What’s one little thing I can do to get unstuck?

Once I have my answers, I use EFT tapping to release any unwanted feelings and beliefs I’ve discovered.  If you are familiar with EFT Tapping, use it to tap through your answers to these questions.

Click here for an illustrated description of EFT Tapping Points. Or, contact me to learn more about my one-on-one EFT services.

Next, take one little step to get unstuck.   One little step, and then another.  Just start. Let go of worrying about the results.  The energy of  forward movement will ease you back into your flow. And, the more old, stagnant energy you release, the stronger your flow will be.

For a free Get Unstuck with EFT Tapping Audio, click here.

May Your Flow Be With You!

Marian

Make Friends with Your Critical Voice

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What does your critical voice tell you?  Does it tell you that you’re not good enough?  Does it scold you when you make a mistake?  Perhaps it tells you that you’ll screw things up.  Or that you’ll never succeed, because you never have…

The power of your critical voice might be so strong that it stops you from truly living your life.  Maybe you’re not going for that job you really want, because the voice tells you you’ll never get it.  Perhaps you avoid social situations, or intimate relationships, because your critic warns you of rejection.

Maybe it’s that chronic critical whisper, that makes you want to hide your creative works.  Or worse, it stops you from creating them at all.

The more you listen to your critical voice, the more you will believe it. When you believe it,  you won’t question it.  And, because you believe it, you will continually behave in ways to prove that the voice is right.

What if, instead of bowing to the power of  your critical voice, you could befriend it instead.

What if you could  make peace with your critical voice  — and ask it to work for you, instead of against you.

As with all friends, to make friends with your critical voice, you must first make an effort to understand it. From both personal and professional experience, here’s what I know about the critical voice inside:

Your critical voice re-circulates old beliefs about yourself.

Your critical voice repeats what other people told you about yourself.

Your critical voice is not your true voice.

Your critical voice is trying to protect you.

You use your critical voice as a way to stay safe.

You are more powerful than your critical voice.

Your critical voice targets the exact places that most need your compassionate forgiveness.

When you truly understand your critical voice, you can begin to see the ways it has tried to protect you from getting hurt. For example, when you believe you’re not good enough, or that your work isn’t good enough, it’s easy to hold back.  Holding back is an effective way to stay safe.  Exactly what your critical voice wants.

Unfortunately, our own critical voice is far more critical than most people would ever be.  And, holding back when you feel discouraged, can feel worse than courageously stepping forward.  In the end, believing in your critical voice will hurt you more than taking risks.

Next time your critical voice tries to discourage you, take a moment to acknowledge her.   Stop to say: “Hello, I hear you. Thank you for keeping me safe.”  Breathe deeply, and allow her words to release.

Next, tell her some of the the encouraging words you’d like to hear instead.  Practice pivoting from critical words to the encouraging words.  It takes time, but with practice, it will become easier and easier to believe in yourself.

Remember that your critical voice targets your most hidden, insecure places.  These are exactly the places that need the most encouragement, the most compassion, the most understanding.  More criticism won’t help — it will only trigger more holding back.  Shift from discouragement to encouragement, and  you will find your courage.

Bottom Line – your critical voice wants to keep you safe.  Honor this, by finding ways to make risk-taking feel safer.  Stop trying to please the critics.  Stop listening to the naysayers.  Instead, surround yourself with encouraging people.  Share your work with people you trust.  Talk to yourself in encouraging ways.  Use techniques such as EFT and guided meditation to help you feel better about yourself.

To learn more about my Tame Your Inner Critic Mini Program, click here.

In Courage,

Marian

P.S.  Share this with someone you’d love to encourage.

4 Steps to Conquer Procrastination

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Procrastination Word Cloud Concept on a 3D cube WhiteboardProcrastination.

We all do it.  Believe me, I KNOW how easy it is to avoid the things I absolutely MUST do.

Sometimes I procrastinate because I have a million ideas swirling around in my head, and I just don’t know where to start.

Then there’s my to-do list– weighed-down with those pesky undone tasks that never get checked off the list.  I can feel it getting heavier by the minute.

To be honest, I’m so good at procrastinating that I needed to follow my own tips when it came to writing this blog.

Here they are:  4 steps to conquer procrastination.  Apply whenever you’re feeling stuck. Rinse and repeat….

1. Get Clear— It’s hard to get things done when you’re not clear about what needs doing. In order to get clear, it’s crucial to reduce anxiety and tension. Anxiety and tension will muddle your mind — high cortisol (major stress hormone) drains blood from the thinking part of your brain.

  • Meditate before tackling big projects. Meditation will help calm and focus your mind.
  • Try deep breathing, yoga, or EFT Tapping to reduce stress and anxiety.
  • Work from a space of relaxed, focused energy to boost clarity and efficiency.

2. Clear Resistance — Even when you KNOW what you need to do, you might be avoiding it. Often, resistance occurs when we feel like something is too hard, or too complicated. To help clear resistance, make it easier for yourself. Here are some suggestions:

  • Create a short list of tasks and schedule them.
  • Divide complex tasks into easier small steps.
  • When working on a task, eliminate distractions to promote easy focus.
  • Set a timer for an allotted amount of time. Stop working when the timer goes off.

3. Clear Fear – Fears of failure, rejection, or even success, can sabotage efforts to achieve your goals. Here are tips to help you increase your confidence.

  • Stay present, and focus on one step at a time. Focus will help diminish, or even eliminate, fear.
  • Embrace mistakes, and know you will learn from them.
  • Bring to mind your unique reasons for accomplishing your goals – let go of what others think.
  • Use EFT Tapping to clear feelings of fear. Contact me to learn more.

4. Tap Into Your Flow – Increase feelings of self-trust and competence to accomplish your to-do list more easily. Here are some suggestions.

  • Bring to mind the good feelings from previous accomplishments. Start from this place of positive energy.
  • Visualize yourself accomplishing your task. Imagine how good it will feel.
  • Build momentum by knocking off a series of small tasks.
  • Use empowering affirmations. (I know I can do this. I’m smart. I have talent..)  Try this with EFT Tapping, for more powerful results.

Above all, have compassion for yourself.  Any form of procrastination is a call for deeper understanding and acceptance of yourself.  This doesn’t mean giving in to procrastination.  It means acknowledging your feelings, and helping yourself release them.

Once you’re clear of old fears and resistance, you’ll be amazed at how quickly you can move forward.

Click here for access to a free Mp3 “Getting Unstuck” with guided tapping to help you get unstuck and get started.  If you’d like to go deeper with EFT to conquer your procrastination, contact me.

Be Well!

Marian

 

Love Always Wins

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Two hearts and rainbow against a blue sky

#LoveWins.

The moments and days following the recent Supreme Court Ruling were like a love-drenched dream.

Just hours after the ruling, an impromptu gathering formed on the steps of Maplewood’s Town Hall in my home town. A joyful celebration bursting with gleeful hoorahs, laughter, and rainbow banners. Families and children, young and old, of differing faith, ethnicity, and sexual orientation, all coming together, fueled by the power of Love.

The feeling of love was potent in the days following the ruling.   Everywhere — the photos, the rainbows, the lovely reminders that #LoveWins

And then slowly, and surely, we slid back to ‘normal.’ Bringing our focus back to more ‘pressing’ issues. Forgetting the feeling of those first few days. The potency dissipating, as we fall out of love.

But, what if each day, each moment, we allow Love to win? What would that mean?

Would it mean acting more loving towards the people in our lives?

Would it mean letting love win in the midst of a heated argument?

Would it mean embracing self-love during triggering moments?

Would it mean lovingly attending to our daily obligations?

Would it mean that we love ourselves more completely?

Love is powerful, unifying, healing, beautiful, divine. It’s what we’re all seeking. So often searching, and never finding.

And yet there it is, all along, inside our hearts. That potent energy of love, seeking to express.

Researchers at the Institute for HeartMath, tell us that the heart is the most powerful generator of electromagnetic energy in the human body. Its electrical field is about 60 times greater than the brain’s. When infused with loving feelings, the heart’s power is truly magnificent.

It’s this radiant, loving heart energy that we feel when we’re falling in love. That uplifts us when we perform acts of meaningful volunteerism. That makes the vision of a baby’s face so incredibly irresistible.

It’s this potent power of love that propels us to celebrate and expand what’s good and right with the world.

When we allow it, LoveWins, every time.  Let’s keep it going.

Love,

Marian

Interested in using EFT Tapping to boost self-love?  Contact me.

Blueberry Bliss

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Blueberry Bliss
Summer comfort food.  So quick, so easy. 
Hits the spot & oh so nourishing.

Ingredients:

1/2 cup (or more) plain yogurt

1 handful fresh organic blueberries

1 tablespoon chia seed

Drizzle of maple syrup

Combine ingredients. Let sit for a few minutes to allow chia seeds to soften and swell.  Enjoy!

Be Well!

Marian

Click here for 10 Easy Ways to Create Comfort.