Marian Buck Murray

EFT and IFS for Sensitive, Creative People. Empower yourself self-compassion and deep understanding.

Bad Day? Try This.

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I’ve had a few of ‘those’ days lately.  You know, those days when nothing seems to go right.  From problems with my computer and email, to issues with my mother’s care, and so on.  And then of course, occasionally, there are disappointments I face as a self-employed person.  When too many glitches combine at the same time, it can make a day feel utterly horrible.

What’s important, on a day like that, is to avoid sliding into a punishing rabbit hole. That place that beckons when things feel their worst.  That place that blames, shames, and tells us how wrong we are.  And then, sternly reminds us that nothing will work out.  It’s a truly awful place to be.

In my opinion, the descent into the rabbit hole serves only to add salt to the wound.  It’s bad enough to have things go wrong.  To add punishment and shame on top, is especially cruel.  So if you do find yourself in the rabbit hole, be kind to yourself, and know that there are ways to find stable ground again.

Here are some ways you can help lift yourself to a better feeling place.

Pause.  Pause and look around.  Pause to notice how you feel about what is happening.  Do what you can to help yourself relieve your feelings.  Try some EFT tapping.  Take a walk outside.  Call a friend.  The goal here is to interrupt your thought pattern, release, and refresh.  This will help you re-engage with more clarity.

Ask.  What is here for me to learn?  What ‘s one thing I can do to help myself right now?  What can I do differently which will help in the future? Who can I ask for help?  What matters most right now? What can I let go of?  How can I see this situation differently?  Asking questions will open your mind to additional solutions and possibilities.

Look.  Look around to notice what’s going right.  Look for something you can accomplish right now.  Look for others who have succeeded in similar circumstances.  Look at what you’re already doing successfully.   Noticing success will enable you to create success more easily.

Encourage Yourself.  Remind yourself of times you’ve gotten through tough situations.  Tell yourself that you can get through this.  Assure yourself that you’ve got what it takes to move forward, even if it’s a baby step.  Above all, be compassionate with yourself.  Compassion and encouragement will empower you to do what’s most beneficial.

The goal here is to get to a better feeling place.  A place where you feel more confident and hopeful.  A place where you feel inspired to take action.  It’s here where you will find the energy to move forward.

My best wishes for your success in whatever you’re facing right now.

Peace,

Marian

For a tapping video to help you through a bad day, click here.

Procrastination: What’s it really about?

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If you ever feel frustrated with your own procrastination, I know the feeling.  Procrastination can be very seductive, and it might feel impossible to resist. Whether it shows up as busy work, succumbing to addictive distractions, or doing nothing at all, it can be a mighty fearsome beast.

As if the results of procrastination weren’t punishing enough, we top it off by beating ourselves up. We say things like:  I’m so lazy.  I never get anything done.  I’ll never get ahead… so why bother?  It won’t work anyway.  I’m such a screw-up.  All of this feels pretty crappy, to say the least.

So what to do when the to-do list feels too hard to accomplish?  Or when you don’t have a clue of what to do.  Maybe you know what you ‘should’ do, but it’s the last thing you want to do. Perhaps you feel like there’s far too much to do, so why even try. 

There are many reasons we use to justify procrastination. Some might be completely justified.  Yet, ongoing procrastination will hold us hostage until we do something about it.

What I’ve found, is that procrastination is seldom solely about the willpower to accomplish more.  Sure, some of our habits might look like a lazy lack of willpower.  Yet, typically, somewhere underneath it all, there’s fear. Fear that might be hiding, or perhaps camouflaged, but strong enough to keep us stuck in procrastination.

The most common of these fears include:  Making a mistake. Being rejected. Shining too brightly. Being incompetent.  Not being enough.  Being too much.  And so on.

What I suggest, when you feel stuck in procrastination, is to proceed with compassionate for yourself.  Beating yourself up will only serve to make you feel worse.  This, of course, can lead to even more procrastination. Or, a flurry of over-activity, followed with a backlash of procrastination. (I’ve done it all…)

What if procrastination is actually a call to look more deeply within. 

What if it’s a call to ask ourselves, what’s triggering me? What am I afraid of? What do I believe about myself? What do I believe about the tasks at hand?  Asking questions is what helps us clarify our blocks and limiting perceptions.

So, once we find our blocks and limiting beliefs — what’s next? 

I highly recommend using EFT Tapping as a tool overcome the emotions and beliefs which underlie procrastination.  Meditation, matrix reimprinting, somatic work, journaling, and/or reaching out to a healing professional are very helpful as well.  Combine your preferred tools and resources to begin resolving the inner conflict which keeps you stuck. I truly believe that until we resolve the issues plaguing us from within, we can only go so far in life.

What I suggest, is to proceed one step at a time. Sometimes the to-do list might look unwieldy. Impossible, perhaps.  Yet, starting with one small action will help build momentum.  Start with one doable task from your list.  Add to that an underlying fear, and use tapping, meditation, or your preferred method, to help it release.

It’s important to take action towards both the tasks that need doing and the limiting beliefs and feelings.  Doing one will help build momentum with the other.  For example, accomplishing a task will help you feel better about yourself, and diminish fear.  Releasing fear and limiting beliefs will enable you get more done.

Start where you are.  Start with something.  Start with one action, one fear.  Build momentum, and go from there.

Here’s to your success!

Peace,

Marian

For a Tapping Video to Help  You Get It Done, Click Here.

Need help getting unstuck? I’m here to help. Reach out.

7 Tips To EMERGE!

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spring bud

There’s life beneath your stuck and frozen places.  Here are some ideas to help you re-emerge into the flow of your life.

1.  Increase Your Circulation  

Cinnamon, ginger, garlic, and turmeric all stimulate circulation. Use plenty. Increased circulation will help ensure healthy nutrient flow, making it easier to move forward.  And, of course, physical exercise will boost your circulation as well.

2.  Eat Probiotics  

Probiotic foods such as miso, kefir, yogurt, kombucha, and probiotic supplements, will help nourish beneficial microflora in your gut.  A healthy gut is crucial for synthesizing the neurotransmitters that keep you feeling happy, focused and motivated.

3.  Do Something Different

Activate your brain cells. New experiences will help stimulate the creation of new neural pathways. New neural pathways will help you emerge from stuck places.

4.  Plan something exciting

Awaken your sense of adventure. Begin the process of planning a future, exciting, event or trip.  Allow the process to inspire you.

5.  Reorganize Your Space

Reorganize your work or creative space. Shifting and sorting your space will help spark new ideas.

6.  Show Up For Yourself 

Decide upon a small project or activity to complete. Next, allow 15 minutes to 1 hour to spend on your project. When your time is up, stop. Don’t worry if it’s not finished, not perfect, or if you barely got anything done. Just keep showing up until you accomplish your project. The act of showing up will activate your creativity.

7.  Try EFT Tapping

EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) helps to clear the old neural pathways that keep us stuck in limiting beliefs and patterns.  Once old patterns are cleared, EFT Tapping can help you create new, healthier habits and beliefs.  Contact me to learn more. 

 

Enjoy!  It’s Sprouting Season!

Marian

Getting Unstuck with EFT (free audio….)

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Butterfly drops

I know exactly how it feels to be stuck.  And I know how hard it is to get unstuck.  That’s why I’ve created this 10-minute EFT Tapping audio.   It will help you get unstuck, and activate your own natural flow.

If you’re unfamiliar with EFT and/or the tapping points, click here to watch a short instructional video. Or, click here for an illustrated description of the EFT Tapping Points. Once you’re familiar with all of the points, you’re ready to begin.

I will guide you through this tapping session.  Follow along, using your fingertips to tap gently on the points as I mention them.  You can repeat my words, or simply listen.  This is just a small taste of what EFT can do for you.  If you’d like to go deeper with EFT,  contact me at marian@marianbuckmurray.com.

 

 

DOWNLOAD HERE (Right Click and Save Link): Getting Unstuck

Use this audio whenever you feel stuck.  Feel free to share by using the share buttons below.

Here’s to Getting Unstuck & Activating Your Flow,

Marian

How to Use EFT Tapping to Release Tension (video)

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Here it is.  Finally.  A quick video where I show you exactly how to use the Basic Recipe for EFT Tapping.   If you read my newsletters, you know that I am a Certified EFT Practitioner.  You may have guessed —  I LOVE EFT!

But, you might not know exactly how EFT works. Or, you may have forgotten the tapping points.  Or, you might just want a complimentary mini EFT Session.  So here it is.  Your complimentary mini-EFT session.

Although EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques)  has been around for decades,  there are many people who don’t quite understand it. (And those who have never heard of it. )  In fact, at my monthly EFT workshops at a local hospital,  most of my students have never used (or heard of) EFT.  By the end of class, students are amazed at the power of EFT to help them release and relax!

But not everyone can attend my classes.  And I believe that everyone can benefit from learning how to use EFT.  So,  I’m sharing this how-to-use-EFT  video session with you.  Please share it.

The chosen target (problem) for this session is Tension About An Upcoming Project.  Tapping is a perfect way to release the tension and anxiety which gets in the way of  completing a project.  When you use EFT tapping to release unwanted feelings, it will feel easier to accomplish your tasks.

When you use EFT tapping alone by yourself, practice first with issues that feel simple and light.  If emotions such as anger or sadness come up, just keep tapping to help them release.  And, always,  if a problem feels too hard, persistent, complicated, or traumatic — consult with a professional tapping expert, or other healing professional.

If you’re ready for more in-depth EFT Tapping — to release what’s holding you back —  I’d love to  help.  Click here for information about my EFT Services.

Release, Relax & Tap into Your Brilliance!

Marian