Marian Buck Murray

EFT and IFS for Sensitive, Creative People. Empower yourself self-compassion and deep understanding.

18 Ways to Empower Yourself in 2018

by 2 Comments

 

It’s time.  Time to empower ourselves so we can navigate the tumultuous terrain ahead.  We’re being called to step up, stand up, and make change happen. 

What I truly believe, is that the more we honor our sensitivity and compassion, the more sensitivity and compassion we’ll bring to our sometimes insensitive world.  Too often, it’s the sensitive soul who stays in the background.  It’s time to take a stand for the beauty and love within all of us. 

It’s time for Bold Sensitivity.

Here are 18 ways to help yourself feel more empowered this year, and beyond.

Clean up Your Food – Eat clean, green, and lean.  Detoxify your system, of excess sugar, caffeine, alcohol, and carbs, all of which will weaken your system.

Boost Your Immunity – Use herbs and superfoods such as astragalus, hibiscus, maca, green drinks, shiitakes, burdock, probiotic foods, and umeboshi plum.  All will help strengthen your immunity.

Strengthen your boundaries – By giving and doing for too many, you will deplete your power.  Set clear, healthy boundaries around your time and space.  If you find yourself overwhelmed by loose boundaries, tackle them one by one, starting with a simple one.

Meditate each morning – Morning meditation will help empower you throughout your entire day. 

Clean up your self-talk — Negative self-talk will weaken your spirit.  Here’s a way to clean it up: Get a pen and paper. In the left-hand column, write down a list of negative things you commonly say to yourself.  In the right column, write a list of corresponding positive responses you can tell yourself instead. Practice your positive responses. 

Challenge yourself – Open up to challenges. Expand your limits.  Don’t be afraid of being a beginner, or of making mistakes. The more you challenge yourself, the more proficient you’ll become, and the more powerful you’ll feel!

Exercise your core – The third chakra, the abdominal area, is our power center.  The more you exercise it, the more centered and powerful you’ll feel. Try yoga, pilates, sit-ups, crunches, and/or any other exercises that will strengthen your core.

Clear Your Energy System — Use EFT Tapping to clear unwanted feelings. EFT tapping works to clear energy disruptions, allowing you to access your authentic power more easily.  Click here for a diagram of the points.

Create Nurturing, Empowering Routines — Incorporate nurturing, empowering, routines into your daily life.  How will you start your day?  How will you help yourself enjoy and fully participate in your day?  How will you end your day, so that you sleep well, and wake refreshed?   

Surround yourself with encouraging people — Surround yourself with people who will help build you up when you’re down, and who will encourage your strengths, abilities, and dreams. 

Do a media detox — There’s a lot of toxicity in the news these days. Too much of it can feel depleting, exhausting, and overwhelming.  Allow yourself a detox by limiting your exposure, turning off notifications, switching the channel. Decide how and when you will get the news.  Be in control.

Do something you’re passionate about – Engage your passions!  Whatever they are!  Read, write, play music, sing, create art, volunteer, speak up, take a stand. Ignite your passions feel the sense of true empowerment.

Do Something Scary — It doesn’t have to be a big scary.  Anything scary will do.  What I hear about most from my clients (and myself) is the big sense of relief that comes from getting it over with.  And, often it’s not as bad as we thought.  The best part is that you’ll emerge feeling more empowered, with a renewed sense of courage.

Watch an inspiring movie — Watch a fact-based documentary about someone who inspires you.  Use your inspiration to express yourself in a bold new way.

Ask for help – Asking for help can be very empowering.  If you need help, connect with a trustworthy friend, coach, counselor, or therapist.  We can’t do everything alone — we become far more powerful when we work together.

Get an accountability partner —   Ask a friend or colleague to assist you in committing to self-empowerment. The more you show up for your commitments, the more empowered you’ll feel.

Create a list of power words – Create a list of words that give a sense of self-empowerment, or that describe ways in which you’d like to feel.  For example, use words such as:  productive, courageous, prosperous, prolific, and strong.  Post these words around your space so that you see them regularly.

Listen – Listen to whatever empowers you. Music. Radio. Podcasts. Meditations.  There’s a wealth of inspiration out there in the sound waves.

Do what empowers you. Let go of what depletes you. The world needs your light.

Happy 2018!

In Courage,

Marian

Need some help with self-empowerment? Contact me.

How to Shine When You Feel Like Hiding

by Leave a Comment

 

As I write this, it’s the first week of January, 2018.  Time to get back into the swing of work.  A new stretch of life beyond the overload of the past year.

Emerging from the bliss of vacation time, the comfort of hibernation, or the avoidance of reality, can feel enormously difficult.  I know the struggle all too well. Stepping out of hiding can feel scary.

But, as scary as it is, sooner or later our hiding places get stale, and uncomfortable, and we’re presented yet again with the decision to go deeper into hiding, or step out and shine.

I know the seduction of a comfortable hiding place. I also know the danger of staying too long. I’ve had to re-emerge into life too many times to count.

The good news is, it can be easier than you think to awaken your spirit from its slumber. Here are the ways I’ve found to help myself awaken and emerge into a place of shining:

Cleanse Your System –  Cleansing your system will help wake up your spirit.  Ease off sugar, caffeine, alcohol, and wheat. Drink lots of water, eat plenty of green veggies, and increase your consumption of probiotic foods.  Detoxifying sea vegetables, miso, and green tea will help you shift your tastebuds towards healthy food choices.  Salt baths will help detoxify your system.  

Get Comfortable Feeling Uncomfortable — Be present with yourself as you move through your day. Notice when and where you have the urge to hide, or avoid something.  Instead of hiding, or avoiding, stay with your feelings, or release them, using one of the techniques mentioned below.  Keep moving forward.  Action will help dispel your discomfort, and increase your courage to stretch even further.

Clear Your Energy — Use energy tools such as EFT Tapping, Meditation, Heart Breath, Yoga, Qigong, and Reiki, to clear unwanted feelings. Often, we can feel overloaded by other people’s needs and negative energy. Combine this with our own stuck emotions, and it can feel impossible to move forward. These energy techniques will help you cleanse and strengthen your energy, making it easier, and more enjoyable to shine.

Ignite your Passion – Read, watch, listen, do, whatever it is that lights you up.  Be vigilant about maintaining fuel for your fire. Often, in hiding, we allow our inner flame to become nearly extinguished, making it difficult to emerge. Special attention to your unique creative expression and desire is necessary to re-ignite your passion and inner power.

Use Creative Visualization — Sit quietly, close your eyes, and breath deeply. Imagine a ball of golden light (or any color you desire) over the top of your head.  Allow this light to flow down into and around your body. See the light cleansing and releasing whatever needs to go.  Notice that as the light cleanses you, your inherent brilliance begins to emerge. Allow the light to radiate beyond your body, forming a beautiful field of your personal essence all around you. Stay with hthis visualization as long as you like.  Emerge with the sense that you’re radiating your inner light.

Step Forward and Shine– Start where you feel safe and encouraged, whatever this means for you. Stretch from there, in the direction that feels best for you. Choose your pace. Choose your style.  Just keep moving forward.

We need your light!

In Courage,

Marian

I’d love to help you emerge from hiding.  Contact me to learn more about how EFT Tapping and Matrix Reimprinting can help you re-ignite your passion, power, and courage. 

Overwhelmed? This will help.

by Leave a Comment

 

I‘m writing this post during the first week of December 2017.  I’ll admit, I’m feeling rather overwhelmed.  Between the holidays, work, persistent political discomfort, numerous unpredictable and unprecedented events, Mercury-in-Retro, and my new online Sensitive Spirit Shop, I’m finding it really hard to stay centered.

It’s common to feel overwhelmed during the holidays.  For sensitive people, like myself,  feeling overwhelmed can occur far too frequently.  Most of my sensitive friends and clients tend to ‘absorb’ other people’s energy — such as thoughts, opinions, feelings, etc.  Unfortunately, carrying around this extra cloud of other-peoples-stuff only adds to feelings of overwhelm.

When you feel overwhelmed, what happens for you?  Maybe you feel paralyzed.  Perhaps you go into over-drive.  Or maybe you struggle through, despite feeling scattered and off-balance.

During overwhelming times, it’s essential to take extra good care of yourself.  Right when it feels most difficult — PAUSE — and take care.  Self-care is not a luxury.  Self-care is an essential element of a well-balanced, happy life.

Here’s a quick list of my favorite tools for stepping out of overwhelm:

Embrace Yourself –Literally, embrace yourself.  Close your eyes, wrap your arms around your torso, and hug yourself, pressing gently against your heart.  This will help stimulate feelings of self-compassion.  Self-compassion will help you feel more relaxed, and more able to take action.

Pick one thing to do — Just start.  Don’t worry if it’s the right thing to start with.  The act of taking action will help you feel empowered, and less overwhelmed. It will also help inspire you to keep going.

Let Go – Let go of unrealistic expectations.  Let go of responsibilities that don’t belong to you.  Let go of over-giving.  Let go of whatever is not your true responsibility or necessary for your health and wellbeing.  This takes practice, and practice makes progress.

Heart Breath – Close your eyes, and begin a slow deep breath, from deep down in your belly.  Next, move your breath up to your heart, and imagine that you are breathing from your heart.  Use this breath for 1 minute, or as long as you like, to drop out of an overwhelming head-spin.  The Heart Breath will help you come into focus.

Take a walk. Getting away from your full plate of duties will you help clear your mind, and freshen your perspective.

Ask for help —  Asking for help is difficult for many of us.  It might feel as though you’re the one who’s always helping, and there’s no one to help you.  Or that others are too taxed to help.  It’s important to remember that most people like to help when they are able.  Help comes in many packages –from delegating chores, asking for supportive encouragement from a friend, or reaching out to a professional for deeper assistance.  Give yourself a break — ask for help.

Use EFT Tapping — EFT is a great tool to release the anxiety that accompanies overwhelm.  When you release feelings of anxiety and frustration you help loosen your perception of being overwhelmed.  Click here for a video to learn the EFT Basics.

Meditate — Meditate.  Meditate every day. Use whichever method works best for you.  Stay consistent, and you will notice changes.  Consistent meditation has been proven to help the brain handle stress more effectively.  For a variety of guided meditations, the Insight Timer phone app is fantastic.

Journal — Get it out of your head, and onto paper.  Whatever it is, get it on paper to relieve the clutter in your mind.

Breathe Deeply — Deep breath, as simple as it sounds, is the key to balance and relaxation.  Take frequent deep-breathing breaks.  Bring your breath deep below your diaphragm to stimulate the relaxation response.  Relaxation is just what we need when we’re feeling overwhelmed!

Embrace your beautiful sensitive spirit. 

In Courage,

Marian

Contact me to learn how to use EFT Tapping and Matrix Reimprinting to free yourself from feeling overwhelmed.

Finding Gratitude in the Dark

by Leave a Comment

 


With all that’s happening right now in the world, I’m actually finding it easier to feel grateful for what I have.  This good, since gratitude is something I use to lift my spirits and optimism.

Frequently, during my meditations, I envision my negative feelings, habits, and beliefs, as gems, hidden in the dark. Sometimes, I envision a friendly group of light-beings with a spray bottles of love, misting me with unconditional LOVE. 

Always, during these meditations, I feel a sense of gratitude for my dark places.  I shift into a new perception of the deeper meaning of my feelings and habits. Afterwards, I often notice a change in my behavior and life experience.  

What I noticed recently, was an ability for me to feel gratitude for some of my ‘faults’ but not others.  In other words, I could easily send unconditional love to some of my dark places, but not others.  I found myself automatically justifying my negative judgement of certain behaviors or habits, while easily forgiving others. This new perception is now helping me let go of crusty, old self-judgements I took for granted.

And, yeah, okay, some things in life really suck.  And it’s not that I want to bury things, or pretend everything’s okay when it’s not (been there, done that, doesn’t work.)  Rather, I believe that it’s important to first acknowledge the pain, and then to find gratitude.

This is not a head-thing. It’s not a matter of deciding to be grateful and waiting for it to happen.  It’s not a matter of pretending to be grateful. It’s not about ‘shoulding’ yourself to be grateful.

This is about finding gratitude.  Finding hidden gems in dark places.  Going on a treasure hunt right smack in the middle of the places you’d much rather avoid.

Here are some questions that will assist you in finding gratitude in the dark:

  1. PHYSICAL PAIN OR ILLNESS – When I found gratitude for my own illnesses and heart surgeries, I was able to see how they had enabled me to deepen my spirituality.  From my physical pain, I was able to learn what I needed to heal emotionally.  In addition, I met wonderful people, learned how to receive love, got really healthy, and on and on and on.

Helpful Questions:  What is this illness/pain telling me? What am I learning that will help enhance my life? What enjoyable experiences am I having as a result of this illness? 

  1. PERSONAL QUALITIES —  My sensitivity always seemed to be a weakness.  I was prone to feeling hurt and misunderstood. I was constantly being worried about other people’s feelings and opinions.  When I began to find gratitude for my sensitivity I saw all of its  incredible qualities:  Deep understanding for my clients, strong intuition, compassion for humankind, and so much more.  This gratitude helped me let go of so much of the pain.

Helpful Questions:  How is this quality helping me be the person I want to be?  How did this quality help me navigate a difficult time? How can this quality help me understand myself more deeply?

  1. CURRENT LIFE SITUATIONS: It’s can be really tough to feel grateful for tough times.  I’ve found however, that it’s my gratitude that helps shift my situation.  For example, by feeling grateful for ‘lean times’ I can see all the ways in which I am not a victim, and how I can actually use the situation to strengthen myself and learn new helpful habits and skills. 

Helpful Questions:  How is this situation helping me change what needs to change?  How is this situation deepening my spirituality or inner strength? How is this situation teaching me something valuable for my future?

  1. CURRENT GLOBAL SITUATIONS: Okay, sometimes it might feel downright impossible to feel grateful for a dictator, an environmental disaster, human rights violations, or political disarray.  Without condoning, or excusing anything about what seems unacceptable, you can find gratitude for what happens as a result.  For example, finding gratitude for new revelations, new innovations, grassroots efforts, or a deeper understanding of the human condition.   Despite my own upset over the current political climate in the USA, I am grateful for my growing ability to discern what’s truly valuable to me, and to speak out more vocally.

Helpful Questions:  How is this situation causing positive ripple effects?  How could this situation lead to new innovations?  How has my awareness changed as a result of this situation? What can I do to help?

Experiment with gratitude in unlikely places. 

In Love and Gratitude,

Marian

 

For a free EFT Tapping Audio, Overcome Your Fear of Shining, click here.

 

 

How to Stand in Your Truth

by Leave a Comment

 

As I write this, the autumn wind is blowing hard.  Leaves swirl and fall.  The trees and their branches creak, and sway.  And yet the trees keep standing, rooted in strength and purpose.

Of course, there are storms that fell and uproot the trees.  But so often, it’s the trees with a compromised root system, or some sort of decay, that fall.  Healthy trees, with strong wood, and deep roots, are most likely to weather the storm.

As a sensitive person, I know what’s it’s like to falter and stumble in my own truth.  Not so long ago, I felt consumed by a persistent cloud of other people’s opinions, swirling around me, distracting me.  So many differing ideas to consider and conform to.  So many rules to follow.  I was pulled in too many directions.

And while I stumbled around in that cloud of other people’s stuff, I somehow felt responsible for it all.  Speaking up for myself, felt onerous.

But of course, I am not responsible for it all.  I am only responsible for myself.  And when I let go of believing I’m responsible for other people’s reactions, I am free to stand in my Truth.

It’s a continual process, but one I enjoy.  The deepening of WHO I AM, and the letting go of all that impedes my natural flow.

In my work with myself and with my clients, I can clearly see the distracting swirl that attempts to obscure the truth of who we are. I can also see the beauty of Truth, waiting, and ready to be seen.

So how do we stand strong, when we feel like hiding?  How do we speak up, when we doubt our own voices?  How do we honor ourselves, when we’re pulled in so many directions? How do we show our true colors, even when it feels so scary?

Embracing Truth is not always easy.  It doesn’t happen overnight.  But believe me, the experience is truly sacred.

Here’s how:

Get clear about Who You Are. Only you can know the Truth of Who You Are.   Write a list of what you love about yourself, what you love to do, what you know to be true.  Spend time with this list, and add to it as you need.

Meditate – sit quietly, daily. It’s by sitting with yourself, that you will come to know yourself on the deepest levels possible.  Practice by sitting in silence, or with meditative music, for 5-10 minutes to start. Work up to 20, 30, and 60 minutes or longer.  Results are cumulative, and profound.

Use Your Imagination. See yourself standing in a bubble, in the midst of a field of other people’s opinions, reactions, and worries.  Next, imagine a white light (or any color you like) filling your bubble.  As the light fills your bubble, allow it to wash away everything but you.  See yourself standing strong, and peacefully, in a clear, clean space.   Call upon this cleansing bubble as you move through your day.

Practice. Experience will help you move forward. Experiment sharing your truth, and unique forms of expression, with people who support you.  This could be with a friend or family member, within an online group or support group, or with a therapist or counselor.  You can even practice recording yourself with your smartphone.  The more you practice, the easier it will get.

Get Started. What is it you want to create? So often we hold back, waiting for some sort of permission to get started.  Express yourself creatively, just for the experience.  This will assist you in clarifying, and expanding, your unique style.

Connect With Your Intuition. Use EFT Tapping, Meditation, and the Heartbreath Meditation  to connect with yourself.  It’s within this deep connection, that your intuition is strengthened.  Become familiar with this space, and allow it to inform you.  Take direction from your intuition, and let the rest go.

Reveal your true colors, share the beauty of who you really are.

In Truth and Love,

Marian

For more information on how EFT Tapping and Matrix Reimprinting will help you stand in your own powerful truth, contact me.