Marian Buck Murray

Release, Relax, Tap into Your Brilliance. EFT Tapping to help you unleash your creative genius.

My Shortlist of Books to Help You Go Deeper

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I’m keeping this post extra short with a shortlist of books I love.  These books are potent and you might want to keep them handy so you can revisit them again and again.

The Untethered Soul
by Michael Singer

This beautiful book is simple, and profound.  Michael Singer takes us on a lovely dive through consciousness, into the liberation of the soul.  It’s in this place of the soul, that we find freedom from the thoughts that bind us.  Rich, and meditative. 

The Easiest Way to Live
by Mabel Katz

This book is based on Ho’oponopono, the ancient Hawaiian art of problem-solving.  Mabel Katz teaches us how to use the Ho-oponopono prayer:  I’m Sorry, Please Forgive Me, Thank You, I Love You.  The philosphy: when we take responsibility for our lives, we can heal our lives.  A thoughtful, insightful book, for those who are interested in learning how to use Ho’oponopono to make life easier.

Everything is Here to Help You. A Loving Guide To Your Soul’s Evolution, 
By Matt Kahn

Although this is perhaps the most woo-woo of the bunch, this book has practical guidance for evolving your soul.  Matt Kahn gives us step-by-step guidance for moving from ego-driven blame and self-denial, into self-love and authentic expression.  Included is a chapter with clearings and prayers to help the reader clear out old beliefs and patterns.

Crossing to Avalon
By Jean Shinoda Bolen, MD

Beautifully written, Jean Shinoda Bolen brings us on a pilgrimage through some of the most sacred sites in Europe.  A blending of memoir, myth, and the mystical Holy Grail, Bolen guides the reader into a deeper appreciation of the sacred feminine. Rich in spiritual metaphor, this is the kind of book you’ll want to savor, slowly.

The Empath Survival Guide: Life Strategies for Sensitive People
by Judith Orloff, MD

This is a great self-help book for sensitive, empathic people. Psychiatrist  Judith Orloff, an empath herself, gives us assessments, tools, and techniques to navigate a not-so-sensitive world.  A helpful book, combining  expert guidance, and first-hand experience.

Enjoy!  Let me know which are your favorite books for diving deep into your soul!  Leave a comment below.

In Love and Courage,

Marian

 

To learn how to use EFT Tapping and Matrix Reimprinting to go deeper within your own consciousness, contact me.

 

How to Enjoy Vacation with Extended Family and Friends

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Okay.  I love my family.  I do.  Yet, getting together for a week-long vacation, with my mother, brother, husband, daughters, sisters, nephews, nieces, additional extended-family members, and assorted friends, can be trying for a sensitive person like myself. 

And that’s just what I did. Down the Jersey Shore. I had a blast!

Like most sensitive people, I crave alone-time, serenity, harmony, and lots of quiet.  It’s not that none of that was available during my vacation.  Many times, though, I had to actively cultivate it for myself.  

Most importantly, it’s what I allowed myself to do, knowing that by honoring my need for self-care, I would be more able to enjoy my family and friends.

Here are some tips to help you make your gatherings more enjoyable:

Take time for yourself.  This is crucial.  Get up early to take a walk by yourself.  Go on a solo adventure.  Meditate.  Read. Do some EFT Tapping.  Taking time for yourself will help you get centered, grounded, and present.  And…more able to enjoy the people around you.

Limit alcohol consumption.  If you drink, consider reducing what you’d normally drink on vacation. Alcohol can easily build up, leaving you feeling groggy and even depressed.  Alcohol, of course can also contribute to heated discussions and arguments.  Instead, keep yourself hydrated with water and  herbal drinks.

Disengage from drama.  When heated discussions or arguments do arise, step back from the drama.  Unless it’s crucial to clarify a point, there’s no need to fuel drama.  Expectations, and often emotions, run high during gatherings with family and friends. Stepping back as a more neutral observer will help you keep the peace. And, peace, for the sensitive person, is bliss.

Stretch yourself by communing with your vacation-mates.  Strike up a conversation with someone you don’t normally talk to.  Find out more about the people you’re with.  Participate in activities you’d normally skip.  Stretch and experience the experience!  By consistently allowing yourself downtime, stretching in new ways will be a whole lot easier!

Bring reading materials— Easy-reads work best in distraction-filled environments. Treat yourself, and read something that truly appeals to your senses.  Good reading materials are key to enjoying yourself during down-times, and inclement weather.

Plan Meals in Advance – Who will be cooking meals? Will you be bringing pre-cooked meals? How will expenses, shopping,  and kitchen duties be shared?  Any special diets?  Will you be eating out?  Getting clear about kitchen duties will help you by-pass a lot of confusion, and discontent.

Plan Activities in Advance – If your vacation includes sight-seeing, and/0r out-door activities,  make sure to research and plan accordingly. Where possible, stay flexible, and open to compromise.  Consider consulting with a travel agent to help you customize your travel plans to satisfy the different members of your group.

Participate and contribute – Give your fair share in terms of expenses, and effort, yet don’t be afraid to ask for help. Do your part to keep things equitable for yourself and others.

Enjoy!  And don’t forget to take lots of photos.

In Love and Courage,

Marian

Contact me to learn how to use EFT Tapping to help you clear family conflict.

Let Go of Over-Responsibility

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We tend to grasp onto what feels familiar, no matter how limiting or uncomfortable.  If you’re a sensitive person, you might be holding onto the belief that you’re responsible for far more than is actually possible.  It may feel incredibly difficult, if not impossible, to let go of responsibility.

Many of my clients complain of feeling overwhelmed, and sometimes resentful of the load they’re carrying.  Fortunately, even in the most challenging circumstances, it’s possible to make changes that will lighten the load.

Here are some signs you might be dealing with over-responsibility:

Feeling responsible for Others’ Feelings – How often do you walk around not only feeling others’ feelings, but also feeling responsible for changing them? 

Feeling Responsible for Others’ Mistakes – Do you ever feel in some way responsible when a family member, partner, or friend, acts out in anger or other challenging ways?

Taking responsibility for Others’ Problems – How often do you step into the role of “the only one” who can solve the problems of the family, office, social setting?

Feeling like you have to fix or save the world – Do you ever feel overly stressed about problems in the world, and responsible to fix things?

How to let go of over-responsibility:

Practice awareness. Become aware of all that you feel responsible for. Notice the difference between the different types of responsibilities you take on.  Which ones feel heavy?  Which ones feel light? Which ones feel right?  Which ones trigger resentment?  Which ones feel impossible?

Decide which responsibilities are truly yours. For example, these responsibilities will typically include do-able practices and actions related to your health, your mood, your mind, and certain aspects of your job, family, and social and global situations.

Get clear about responsibilities that are not truly yours.  Other people’s feelings, behavior, and problems…

Decide which responsibilities you’d like to let go. For example consider letting go of: Trying to fix someone’s mood. Taking on too much.  The belief that you’re responsible for everything and everybody in your life.  Feeling responsible for things you cannot control.

Ask for Help — Asking for help can feel difficult for the overly-responsible person.  However, it’s crucial.  Choose responsibilities to delegate or to share with another.  Ask a family member, friend, or colleague for help.  You might be surprised…people will often say YES.

Surrender overly-challenging or impossible responsibilities. On a piece of paper, draw a line down the center to form two columns. Label the left-hand column MINE, and write down responsibilities you know you can handle.  Label the right-hand column UNIVERSE and write down responsibilities that aren’t yours, or those that you struggle with. Imagine surrendering these responsibilities to a greater source of help and inspiration.  Imagine the possibility of welcome solutions, and new forms of assistance.

Another way to do this is to write each overly-challenging/impossible responsibility on a small piece of paper.  Place them in a box or jar labeled Universe.  (or Surrender, or Source, or God, or Goddess….)

Use Meditation and Creative Visualization: Meditate on letting go of extra layers of responsibility and stress.  See yourself able to easily let go of what’s not yours to handle.  Instead of engaging with each responsibility, allow your breath to assist the release.  Envision yourself centered in your strength, knowing what’s yours, and letting go of the rest.

Use EFT Tapping: EFT tapping is effective for helping to release stress and anxiety when you’re feeling overwhelmed by responsibilities.  Tapping helps to lower cortisol, and  increases blood flow to the thinking part of the brain.  This will help you deal more effectively with your challenges.  Click here for an illustrated guideline of the tapping points.  Contact me to learn more about using EFT.

Let go, surrender, allow.

In Love and Courage,

Marian

Embrace The Metaphors Within You

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Metaphors have always been there, reaching out to guide me — even when didn’t notice, or when I tried to push them away.  And, now, when I open to their call, I begin to see them everywhere. In every challenge, every pain, every place of beauty. They’re here for us each day, in every moment.  

The poetry of life, waiting for us to embrace its eternal, loving guidance.

It was one day, many years ago, when I realized the power of what was inside me, begging to be seen.  It was a hot day in August, and as I listened to the cicadas sizzling in the trees, it dropped, right smack into my consciousness.  A neat little package of metaphors, it was the answer to the questions I had been asking for over 15 years.  Finally, I knew, without a doubt, why I had gotten sick, over and over again.

My heart, my body, my spirited inner child, were all in it together, creating the poetry that would guide me back to health.  Urging me to open my heart.  Showing me where I had shut down.  Painting the picture I needed to see to finally wake up from my pain.

It turned out, that each symptom, each autoimmune illness, each heart surgery, were all pieces of the same puzzle. When I saw them all together, they revealed the divine map I needed to heal from the trauma I had experienced many years earlier, when I lost my sister to suicide.

In my work with clients, metaphors appear everywhere. They show up as a restriction, or pain in the throat, for a client who’s afraid to speak her truth.  Or as a tight heaviness in the shoulders, for someone who feels as though she carries the world on her shoulders.  Sensitive digestion, is often a sign of deep sensitivity, and an inability to digest all the worries of the world.

Though these metaphors can sometimes seem obvious, it’s usually not that simple. 

Layers of meaning abound, and for each one of us, they are uniquely personal.  It’s where we go next after that first glimpse of the metaphor. What lies underneath?  What guidance do we need to follow? What pain is asking to be loved and released?

Both EFT Tapping and Matrix Reimprinting are the perfect tools to help my clients uncover hidden metaphors within their pain.  As we gently unwrap the layers, pain is released, and messages are discovered.  Wisdom emerges, leading to even deeper healing.

The way I see it, it all comes back to a call for love.  The metaphors within us, the metaphors all around us, are beckoning us to love ourselves more.  To forgive, to let go, and to open up to the love that’s all around us.  Simply, and profoundly, they are love poems, ready and waiting to be read.

Curious about the metaphors within you?  Contact me!

In Love and Courage,

Marian

How to Thrive in This Sometimes Toxic World

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My clients often tell me about feeling challenged to stay happy and calm in a world that can feel so cold, hard, and even toxic at times. This challenge can feel especially acute for those of us who are highly sensitive and empathic.  Often there’s a question about how to handle ‘difficult’ people and challenges without falling off track, getting stepped upon, or hurt in some way. Although it is certainly not possible to control anyone, there are many ways to make situations better by shifting our perceptions, and healing our inner triggers.

Here are some tips to help you not only survive, but truly thrive in the world today.

Let go of trying to change people. It’s wasted energy.  Focus instead on cultivating your own inner-peace with your favorite practices.  When we’re feeling peaceful, everything feels easier.  And, many times, the person, or situation will seem less challenging as well.  Let go of your need to be right, or fix someone, and observe how others respond.

Work on your own triggers.  When things get tough, it’s easy to get triggered.  If you feel triggered by someone’s actions, or by an event or circumstance, that’s a sign that you might have unhealed wounds.  Use these uncomfortable situations as a way to send love and compassion to your inner wounds. Sometimes, this compassion is enough to soothe an inflamed trigger.  EFT Tapping  helps to deactivate triggers, so that you can feel more comfortable, no matter what’s going on.  Contact me  to find out how to use EFT Tapping to deactivate your triggers.

Speak up for yourself. Even though it might feel more comfortable to stay silent when people or situations upset you, speaking up for yourself is crucial. This doesn’t mean unleashing your anger at every upsetting circumstance.  On the contrary.  If you’re feeling anxious, or highly emotional, it’s best to pause to allow yourself to breathe slowly, and deeply. This will help you reduce cortisol, and relax your nervous system.  When you’re relaxed, the thinking part of your brain receives more blood, and is therefore more effective.  This will allow you to articulate what you need to say.  It will also increase your chances of being heard.  (If you find that you’re not calm enough to speak, consider speaking up at a time when you feel calmer.)

Take Control of your Media Usage. Social media, tv, and news all take a toll on our vitality. Stay mindful about your listening, viewing, and reading choices.  This doesn’t mean you have to put your head in the sand.  Instead, by choosing wisely, and limiting your media usage, you will cultivate a sense of balanced control.

Detox your environment. To truly thrive, detoxifying your environment is necessary. Environmental toxins found in water, air, plastics, and textiles will put a strain on your energy and nervous system. When possible, take action to eliminate or reduce your exposure to environmental toxins. This might mean filtering your water or air, reducing your use of plastic, or gradually replacing synthetics with natural fabrics.  It’s worth it.

Eat clean. Eat plenty of greens, eliminate or reduce simple carbs, and drink lots of water.  Choose minimally processed, and organic when possible.  If you eat animal products, grass-fed, and wild are usually your best choices for minimal exposure to toxins.

Detox Your Body-Mind – Salt baths, yoga, meditation, dance, exercise, massage, prayer, and mind-body therapies are all excellent tools to keep yourself vibrant and happy. Regular practice, especially for sensitive people, is crucial to maintain vibrant happiness and health.

Take care of yourself.  We need your light!

In Courage,

Marian

To schedule a FREE 30 Minute Call, where I’ll help you get clear on your best strategy to honor your sensitivity, and give you a tool to turn it into a superpower,  click here.